m o o d g a r d e n

Just your average 48 year old tattooed woman

This one was told to me by my husband.  He states that his mother told it to him when he was around the tender age of sixteen, and that it scarred him for life.  =]

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What is the difference between a blonde and a washing machine?

A washing machine doesn’t follow you around for a week after you drop a load into it.

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I would also like to state for the record, that while I find this one hilarious, I am also blonde. Under all this red hair dye, that is.  Just in case you were thinking of trotting off in a huff and a Chevy to leave me a scathing comment.

I was thrown out of NYU.  On my metaphysics final, they caught me cheating.  I looked within the soul of the boy sitting next to me.  (Woody Allen)